As I type this...

(about these pictures...i have the hipstamatic app on my iphone. i may need a little practice. can't seem to figure out where the light is going to be. These are pictures of ainsley's recital outfit for ballet.)




My husband is driving his white 2002 altima to Goodwill while dangling a garbage bag containing a dead black bird out of the drivers side window.

Like a week ago, we were out in the back yard when we spotted one of those huge black birds on top of the roof. Aaron ran in to get the bb gun. He came back out, took aim, fired, and to everyone's amazement the bird literally looked up to the heavens and then rolled over the roof towards the front of the house.

Aaron went to destroy the evidence but their was none to be found.

Fast forward to tonight. About 30 minutes before high school bible study starts we both decide we smell death at the front door. Literally. To steal a line from Rapunzel, "It just generally smelled like the color brown." It took us about 30 seconds and one trip up a ladder to confirm that, yes, there was our black bird in the gutter. Fantastic. and gross.

Once removed, the bird CLEARLY could not stay hear until the next trash day (Thursday), which brings us back to aaron's little jaunt to goodwill.

ALSO, I had a wonderful mother's day! I was gifted with some shopping money, a few flowers (which alivia informed me were made of Kleenex), and some beautiful drawings. You may also be interested to know that according to my children, I am 71 years old, 8 feet tall, weigh 5 pounds, and the thing I say the most is "Help me dress up!!!" I should probably be counting my blessings on that last one.

And finally, I'll leave you with a quote from abbey. I texted this to the immediate family so this is old news for ya'll. Aaron took Abbey to the bank the other day and of course she got a sucker. she was telling alivia about her sucker when she got home and alivia wanted to know why she got the sucker. This was abbey's answer which should be read with great annoyance at having to explain the obvious. "ALIVIA, they saw me in the car, they thought I was cute, they got me a present, and the present was a sucker." Hey Abs, don't be so hard on yourself :)

You're only as old as you feel...

Isn't that a saying? I think it is, and normally I would go look it up and make sure before I post it for the world to see but I'm in kind of a time crunch today.

If it is true, today I feel like I'm about 978. Not 31. Or is it 32? Has anyone read Water for Elephants? When he was talking about not being able to remember you age, I was like, this is the story of my life!!

Anyway, it all started when I went for my laser hair removal appointment, or as we tactfully refer to it around here, "getting my mustache zapped off."



Your welcome :)

So, as if that wasn't humiliating enough, my laser person goes, "Oh, you're really broken out!" Which led to me leaving with a tub of retin A. Not gonna lie. I'm excited about this. I hear it makes your skin look bomb. And I've definitely been thinking between the acne and the "fine lines" i've been spotting I could use a little help.

That stuff is no joke. I'm sitting in the car with the air conditioner blasting in my face chanting..."no pain, no gain! no pain, no gain!"

And then I go to my obgyn today for this pain i've been having in my side and he walks in a says, "I'm tellin ya! You have three babies and everything starts fallin apart!" He's lucky he's cute. He can get away with saying that kind of stuff to me. And stuff like, "You may have a hernia."

Fabulous. Oh, to be 16 again!